Last Night of the Proms

Just tuned in to watch the last bit of the Last Night of the Proms. With a line up including Garry Mullen and the Works (i.e the bloke who won Stars in their Eyes a few years back), Barry Manilow and housewife favourite Katherine Jenkins you must have been pretty hardcore to watch the entire thing.

Now don't get me wrong, I am not a classical music snob who despises the last night for its populist appeal, though I know what I like as far as classical goes.It's an impenetrable world of pomposity and wankers galore and you have to be pretty loaded before you can even buy a bloody CD. Make one wrong choice and you're labelled an idiot for liking the tune.

For example, I made it out to one Prom this year with a £5 ticket for the Gallery hoping to hear Respighi's The Pines of Rome, only to read in the guide that some snot nosed undergrad from the Royal Academy of Music has declared it fascist. Apparently it reflects a nationalistic undercurrent in 1920s Italy because it's bombastic and cinematic. To be honest it feels about as fascist as the theme to Bagpuss, or at least no way more fascist than the regular pile of patriotic durge that is the dying moments of the Proms

There is something rather desperate about an audience of Classic FM listeners all singing along to the nation's favourite battle cries, Jerusalem and Pomp and Circumstance No.1 Sure, it's British and all that, and it's a chance for the lower middle class to celebrate the country that has allowed them to organise a mass Pub singalong, but really, why end a world-renowned classical music festival with Barry Manilow?

Oh well, at least noone else noticed the German flags flying proudly from the stands, waving in time. We need something even more 'British' to put them off. Perhaps next year we ought to try Wonderwall with Liam and Noel trying to kill themselves onstage. That should put the Erics off coming.